Entries from March 2008 ↓

MEN ONLY XXX

This is a great show..When the thing opens, just point your Mouse at the picture… It’s great….Don’t wear your mouse out!

DO NOT CLICK IF YOU ARE A WOMAN,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,…………..


CLICK HERE
WHY do woman insist on opening something that says men only!!!!


Marketing

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How to read my blog

When you read the blogs and you see something ( a word or a phrase ) and it is in blue or underlined, that means that it goes to a link on the web. Click it on. sometimes that is the best stuff.

I might say click here, or it might say menu 

Be sure to take the polls and above all thank you for reading the blog. I love comments and feedback.

Monty

Old women and SEX

The first old woman told the second old woman that sometimes she gets her husband excited at night by getting totally naked, lying in bed and putting both legs behind her head, yoga style.

The second old woman thought that this was a great Idea, so that night when her husband went in the bathroom to get ready for bed, she got totally naked and began the process of putting her legs behind her head.  The first leg was kind of tough to put in place as she was a bit arthritic.  However, she finally got it in place.

She had an even tougher time with the second leg, so she rocked herself backwards until she finally got it behind her head. However, she had rocked just a little too hard so that she flipped slightly backwards and got stuck with her butt sticking straight up in the air. It was just then that her husband came out of the bathroom.

‘Agnes!’ he exclaimed.’ For heavens sake, comb your hair and put your teeth in …. You look like an asshole.’

Joke of the day.

Three hicks were working on a telephone tower – Steve, Bruce and Jed. Steve falls off and is killed instantly.

As the ambulance takes the body away, Bruce says, “Someone should go and tell his wife.”

Jed says, “OK, I’m pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I’ll do it.”

Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of beer.

Bruce says, “Where did you get that, Jed?”

“Steve’s wife gave it to me,” Jed replies.

“That’s unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?”

Well, not exactly”, Jed says. “When she answered the door, I said to her, ‘You must be Steve’s widow’.”

She said, “No, I’m not a widow!”

And I said, “I’ll bet you a case of Budweiser you are.

Wilma VS Betty

wilma-betty.jpgWho was hotter. Can you choose between the two MILF’s of the stoneage? I know it is hard, but Wilma with the nice butt and the perky breasts, kind of does it for me.And who gave her that “pearl necklace”? Then again Betty has that girl next door look that can really turn you on. That choker necklace is sexy..

Wilma or Betty you choose…

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Lake house or Ocean house

View Results

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You want me to do WHAT???

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Coincidences

A chicken farmer went to a local bar… sat next to a woman and ordered
a
glass of champagne.
The woman perks up and says, “How about that? I just ordered a glass of
champagne, too!”

“What a coincidence,” the farmer says, “This is a special day for me,
I’m
celebrating.”
“This is a special day for me too, I’m also celebrating!” says the
woman.
“What a coincidence” says the man. As they clinked glasses the farmer
asked, “What are you celebrating?”

“My husband and I have been trying to have a child, and today my
gynecologist told me that I’m pregnant!”
“What a coincidence,” says the man … “I’m a chicken farmer and for
years all my hens were infertile,
but today they’re finally laying fertilized eggs.”

“That’s great!” says the woman, “How did your chickens become fertile?”
“I used a different cock,” he replied.
The woman smiled and said, “What a coincidence”

Original flavor

The name original flavor. Now just the fact that they have had to name something ” Original” Should show you that we have a problem in America.

Just when did it happen, when did we flavor EVERYTHING we always loved?

Take Potato chips for instance. They were always fine, now they come in Sour Cream and chive,Cheddar, jalepeno,burnt,pickle,mesquite,bacon ranch, chili cheese, pizza,salt & vinegar,barbecue, spicy guacamole and buffalo wing. and many more…

Do you see where we are going here? What is next? how about Dogshit? boogers? ear wax? soap? dirt, or maybe pringles with our new flavor ” runny nose”.

We have lost track of what we liked in the beginning. Original.

Do not even get me started about coffee. I swear that someday I am going to hurl when I get a whiff of Hazelnut coffee. That is just gross.

Original doesn’t mean NO flavor, it just tastes the way it is supposed to taste.

Think about everything that is flavored now? Water, peanut butter,yogurt, cheese,sauces,cookies,toothpaste,vitamins,dog food. I KNOW everything.
if we just got rid of 50% of these flavors, it would make shopping easier, and the store could be half the size. our lives would go back to basics. We would be originals again.

Think about this one while you are at it? I just saw a cookbook 101 ways to cook chicken? Are you serious? They should call it 101 ways to screw up an original meat. What is wrong with putting a chicken in the oven the way it is and eating it? OH NO!! lets drown it in vinegar, or sprinle it with BAM!!!. Just leave a good thing alone.

Monty

Coral Seafood Marlborough MA

Why am I in Marlborough. That is for another day. I was not going to do a review, but someday you might be stuck in marlborough.
I cannot help but think that this is a stupid name. I felt like this was supposed to be an upscale restaurant, that ran out of money and creativity. It is in a strip mall where you would find a sub shop, or a store 24. They have one of those tacky signs that is advertising the restaurant, and also looking for a ” skilled server’ mixed messages here.
After we sat at our square table that they graciously flipped up the sides to make it into a card table/dinner table, we met with our waitress and her trainee. We were offered plastic menus that resembled an applebees.
All in all the food was good. i had the broiled fish combo with a house salad. How can you screw that up, I am already miserable thinking that a giant rack of ribs is calling my name at firefly’s down the street.
Overall it was pretty unforgettable, but i had a nice dinner with some business friends. it was a good way to kick back after a day in class.

If you are in marlborough and want fish , by all means drop in. if you are on a diet, throw it out the window for the day and go to Fire flys down the street.

** two Monty Stars

Texas Roadhouse

All i heard is that you have to go to the Texas Roadhouse. I was out and about the other night and decided to give it a try. It is in a mall in Brockton ( if you are NOT going to the Foxy Lady, then why would you go to a mall in Brockton?)
We went there at 9:30 at night, so we did not have to wait. But you can see that they have a huge waiting area, where you can line up with the rest of the low lifes and throw peanuts on the floor.

We were rushed to our seat. Remember the term RUSHED. I felt like we were in a nascar race. The place should be called Speedy’s Roadhouse. They sit you down and your waitstaff immediately asks for your drink and food order. i think you need ADHD to work there. They have a margherita menu and large cold beers. They give you a pail of peanuts ( not good for my diverticulitus).
When you come in, they show you the steaks in a display case they look TERRIFIC.
Ok we give them the drink order. they come in like 30 seconds and they go so what do you want? I said DUDE, cool your jets. He leaves and 2 minuites later, another waitress comes by and says, so what are you having. I say not yet. She leaves. Then i see the other guy coming back and he smiles and says ” so what can I get you tonight” I hold my acerbic tounge. because I want to say FUCK OFF. I say ” give us a minute please”
59 seconds later, the guy comes back ( At this time we may have been seated all of 5 minutes)
Ok so we order. I get one of those nice looking ribeyes in the case. I get two sides. I go for the chili and the sweet potato. The Steak was drowned in some kind of spice. like the kind that outback has. It was lousy not to mention completely under cooked. Of course how could it be cooked it was on the table like 3.8 minutes from the time the order went in. Oh ya we got the recommended onion blosssum before dinner for the table. that sucked it was burnt.
What did I like about the roadhouse besides leaving. I have to tell you this straight up, they have the best damn butter in the world. it has cinnimon or something in it. IT tastes awesome on the hot rolls and then I put it on the sweet potatoe. OMG!!!! That was the best ever.

We chewed and screwed out of there after leaving a short tip. The whole experience was done in 42 minutes. The wait, drinks,appetizers,meal, check etc 42 minutes. It takes longer than that to get a cup of coffe sometimes.

Never again.. I wonder if I can get that butter to go?

Monty

* 1/2 monty stars.

happy Easter

What a stupid holiday. It most certainly has lost the religous meaning to most. All holiday’s should be on Monday or Friday anyway, or whats the purpose.
On another post someday, I am going to list my favorite holidays. My top one would be July fourth for sure. Right up there would be Halloween ( is that a holiday?)
Is it me, or is the the earliest Easter ever? that means no holidays in April. Unless you are a Massachusetts hack, then you get one of those contrived holidays, patriots day, evacuation day. The first is so you can watch the marathon and the second is so you can get drunk on St Patty’s day in Southie.

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” Peep Show”

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” How Easter eggs are made”

Hajjars restaurant of Weymouth

I grew up in Weymouth and when I was a kid, I roller skated at the same site as the restaurant. The same family still owns the property and they operate it as a restaurant and bar. What is a little strange is that my wife grew up only a couple of doors away and also roller skated on the weekends. Little did I know that I was probably bumping into and falling over my future love of my life. Ironic!

Hajjar’s Bar and Grille
969 Washington St.
Weymouth, MA 02189
Ph: 781-340-1870
Fax: 781-340-5331

For some reason I suddenly find myself back in Weymouth all the time after being gone for almost 30 years. Hajjars seems to fit the bill for me. The food is good. The drinks are ample. They have free pizza for awhile on Monday and it is only $2 on Wednesday night.

Try the seadog sandwich on Fridays, it is the special and it is to die for. It was inspired by the one and only “seadog ” of Weymouth The terror of “B” Dock, and the originator of the saying ” WE AINT LEAVIN TILL WE’RE HEAVIN”

You will not heave at Hajjars the food is terrific. The key to any good place in my opinion is the bar and the bartenders. This is where Hajjars gets a five star rating. They have Julliette at the bar and she is the best.julliette.jpg And if you are over served, come back in the morning and have Dr Phil fix you one up to ” come around”.

beer_bucket.jpg Order up a bucket! They are cheaper and they stay cold.

If you go there and Tilly is not there to greet you, you have missed something special. Tilly is the matriarch of the Hajjar family. Most days there are four generations of family there, but without a doubt, it is Tilly that is the glue to it all.

When at the bar, be sure to say hi to the crew: Jaimie, Bob,Don K, Bonsey, Chuck, Skippa the shoemaker, and my mom Evelyn who has been known to do ” the hang” at Hajjars

Monty

Guest critic on Worcester restaurants.

u·biq·ui·tous adjective existing or being everywhere, esp. at the same time; omnipresent: ubiquitous fog; ubiquitous little ants. ubiquitous blogger. Like dogshit, it seems be everywhere ( ubiquitous )

I know I seem like I am everywhere all the time, but I cannot be. Especially now that I am in weight watchers. I cannot be at every restaurant. So I have solicited a few folks to help with the restaurant reviews. Especially in areas that I have little knowledge.

To apply, you need to be sincere, humorous, and overweight. I would not ever listen to a food critic who is skinny.

One of my epicurean friends ” fester” has been kind enough to offer some insiteful views of the restaurants in Worcester. Specifically the Shrewsbury Street area.

I have been asked to provide reviews for the greater Worcester area. Here goes:
Best Seafood: Sole Proprietor, Highland Street, Worcester
I give it 4 stars. Food is consistently good, sometimes great. It is always packed. Great wine selection, service is good. Personal favorites include the seafood saute, crab rangoons, and sesame lobster. Great desert selection.

Best Italian: Used to be Anthony’s on Shrewsbury Street, until the IRS shut it down. Dino’s on Plantation St was good for a long time, still has the best thick crust pizza, bar service now sucks and the portions are small. Also loses points for a dingy, crappy lounge. I give the nod to Via Italian Table on Shrewsbury St (Owned by the same folks that own the Sole Proprietor and 11 Chop House). Good food, great bar, always packed, meatballs taste like home made. Great newcomer is Chioda’s on upper Franklin Street. Try it!

Best Steak House: Many like the 111 Chop House on Shrewsbury St- I say over rated. Floor layout is open, too loud, takes forever to get a cocktail (a personal pet peeve). Steak is pricey but just average. Good wine selection but I don’t drink wine. Personal favorite is Chuck’s in Auburn, but I know the owner and all the bartenders know what to serve me. Willy’s in Shrewsbury gets the most consistently good feedback that I have heard.

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Chinese: Nancy Chang’s on Chandler St for dine in, Chopsticks on Main St for take out, Yong Shing in Auburn for drinks while -u-wait, Dragon 88 in Boylston for Mai-Tai’s (deadly)- food is all the same and you’re hungry 45 minutes later.

Mexican: Margarita Grill in Auburn (see Chuck’s), Tortilla Sams on Highland St (Late night/early AM)- newcomer is Mezcal on Shrewsbury St. Went there tonight- their menu is 2 pages, with one page being all the Tequila drinks they make. Food was tasty and the 5 Pacificos hit the spot. But at the end of the day, food is all the same and you’re hungry one hour later.

Diners: Worcester is known for its Diners. For actual Dinner, Mac’s Diner on Shrewsbury Street is tops. For late night/early AM, Boulevard and Parkway Diners (Shrewsbury St) are where to be.
Breakfast Diner nod goes to Lou-Roc’s on West Boylston Street.
Carl’s Diner in Oxford gets the prize for volume. Unbelievable! Their advertisement in the newspaper says “Lipitor”- enough said.

Chain- Piccadilly Pub in Auburn is a favorite- small, crowded, but fun. Applebee’s is the absolute worst chain in the world- how do they stay in business?

Grinders- Ted’s Deluxe is a meat lovers delight (bacon makes everything better)- Greenwood St, Worcester.

Monty asked me to do a SHrewsbury St review, But I am getting tired. I will say that the best days for The Wonder Bar have come and gone- service sucks, overpriced, atmosphere sucks. Take-out pizza is the only thing left there.

Flying Rhino is too funky for me- very eclectic.

Tribeca is overpriced, dark, and no fun. Brew City is ok- blah blah blah.

More reviews at a later date.

Fester

” That was an excellent review, I would trust his judgment. Fester is if nothing less, sincere,humorous and he is certainly pleasantly plump. Some would say ” husky”"

How smart are you?

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Got a Monty Minute?   Then  CLICK HERE and find out

Guess who this star is?

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Happy St. Patricks Day

You Gotta Love the Irish

 

 

 

 

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn’t find a parking place. Looking up to heaven he said, “Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey!” Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, “Never mind, I found one.”

ababab

Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and asks the first man he meets, “Do you want to go to heaven?” The man said, “I do, Father.”

The priest said, “Then stand over there against the wall.”

Then the priest asked the second man, “Do you want to go to heaven?”

“Certainly, Father,” the man replied.

“Then stand over there against the wall,” said the priest.

Then Father Murphy walked up to O’Toole and asked, “Do you want to go to heaven?”

O’Toole said, “No, I don’t Father.”

The priest said, “I don’t believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die you don’t want to go to heaven?”

O’Toole said, “Oh, when I die , yes. I thought you were getting a group together to go right now.”

ababab

Paddy was in New York .He was patiently waiting and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The cop stopped the flow of traffic and shouted, “Okay, pedestrians.” Then he’d allow the traffic to pass.

He’d done this several times, and Paddy still stood on the sidewalk.

After the cop had shouted, “Pedestrians!” for the tenth time, Paddy went over to him and said, “Is it not about time ye let the Catholics across?”

ababab

Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney. “Did you see the paper?” asked Gallagher. “They say I died!!”

“Yes, I saw it!” replied Finney. “Where are ye callin’ from?”

ababab

An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut . The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest’s breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, “Sir, have you been drinking?”

“Just water,” says the priest.

The trooper says, “Then why do I smell wine?”

The priest looks at the bottle and says, “Good Lord! He’s done it again!”

ababab

Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender, “Pour me a stiff one – just had another fight with the little woman.” “Oh yeah?” said Charlie , “And how did this one end?”

“When it was over,” Mike replied, “She came to me on her hands and knees.”

“Really,” said Charles, “Now that’s a switch! What did she say?”

She said, “Come out from under the bed, you little chicken.”

ababab

 

Patton staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Kathleen.

He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.

Managing not to yell, Patton sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.

He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.

In the morning, Patton woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Kathleen staring at him from across the room.

She said, “You were drunk again last night weren’t you?”

Patton said, “Why you say such a mean thing?”

“Well,” Kathleen said, “it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly ….. it’s all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.

Subject: Irish Lent
>
>
>
> An Irishman moves into a tiny hamlet in County Kerry, walks into the pub
> and promptly orders three beers. The bartender raises his eyebrows, but serves
> the man three beers, which he drinks quietly at a table, alone.
>
> An hour later, the man has finished the three beers and orders three
> more. This happens yet again. The next evening the man again orders and drinks
> three beers at a time, several times. Soon the entire town is whispering about
> the Man Who Orders Three Beers.
>
> Finally, a week later, the bartender broaches the subject on behalf of
> the town. “I don’t mean to pry, but folks around here are wondering why you
> always order three beers?”
>
> “Tis odd, isn’t it?” the man replies. “You see, I have two brothers, and
> one went to America , and the other to Australia . We promised each other that
> we would always order an extra two beers whenever we drank as a way of keeping
> up the family bond.”
>
> The bartender and the whole town were pleased with this answer, and soon
> the Man Who Orders Three Beers became a local celebrity and source of pride to
> the hamlet, even to the extent that out-of-towners would come to watch him
> drink.
>
> Then, one day, the man comes in and orders only two beers. The bartender
> pours them with a heavy heart. This continues for the rest of the evening. He
> orders only two beers. The word flies around town. Prayers are offered for the
> soul of one of the brothers.
>
> The next day, the bartender says to the man, “Folks around here, me
> first of all, want to offer condolences to you for the death of your brother.
> You know-the two beers and all.”
>
> The man ponders this for a moment, then replies, “You’ll be happy to
> hear that my two brothers are alive and well. It’s just that I, meself, have
> decided to give up drinking for Lent.”
>
>
>
> H A P P Y
>
> S T. P A T R I C K ‘ S
>
> D A Y T O Y O U
>

Proper way to toss a golf club

Some of the few times in my life that I have had some regrets have been on a golf course.I suck and I know it. So why do I get frustrated? I do not know, but a few times I have been so frustratedI have thrown clubs. I have regretted all of them. You can definitely hurt someone. You almost always look like an asshole. Why do you get mad at a game that you know you suck at and is supposed to be fun? Beats me…..

One time my cousin Fred who is, or was a golf course superintendent got pissed off at a shot he hit and threw his club up into a tree. He had to ask a member of the grounds crew at Pembroke Country club to retrieve it. I remember his face to this day. I never saw someone so embarrassed.

I wish I could say I tossed my last one, but being the angry white man that I am, it sometimes gets the best of you and you just got to let one fly. SO, if you have to chuck one, at least learn how to do it properly. CLICK HERE for directions

End of the email ERA

Thank you so much for the many responses from my email earlier this week. I did not realize that you sick bastards liked my emails so much. I think you missed the point and blamed the IT guy. It does slow down the network, but no one told me to stop. I just figured that maybe it was time. The real point I wanted to make was that I was getting sick of people telling me that it was their perception that it was all I did. That was hurtful and I heard it a few times I was just trying to communicate with people in my own way, and to make people laugh a little. At the internet speeds now, it really only took a few minutes a day.

 

Here are some of the responses from all over the country:

 

I think Monty should invest all his Super Bowl money he made towards an offsite, juiced-up, new server. I’ll contribute to the user fees if he’ll stay alive and active with his fellow email junkies…..

 

Monty DON”T SPAM US….WE LOVE YOU….don’t let turning 50 wear you down…sounds more like male menopause setting in!!

My best,

 

There are very few things in life that are good that we can actually count on.  This blog is one of them.  The Monty e-mails was another, until today that is.

I think it is a shame that a few ill-tempered, mean spirited people  could bring down such an institution.  While lacking in all social graces and disturbing at times, the overall contribution was indeed positive.

In the insurance business, I deal with “aggregators” on a daily basis.  None hold a candle to the great aggregator of e-mail-  Monty.

Say it aint so!

 

Are you kidding me. Unless you are a moron or visiting this planet for the first time, E-mail correspondence takes about 4 minutes a day and is a mental release to allow for more productive time. I hope your server crashes with fraudulent claims from the new contacts that come your way. Re-consider and send it through someone else’s station like Jack Bauer would do.

  By the way, could you re-send the one with the glasses…………<grin>

GLEN DON’T YOU HAVE A PC AT HOME?  WHAT ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS? ARE WE NOT WORTHY OF YOUR HOME TIME? LOL 

 

Mony, I have been out sick for the last couple of days. What is this all about? Who could possibly be bitching or degrading you for the 15 min of time you might spend a day. Are you shitting me? Fuck them all. I appreciate your efforts. My days will suck now for something I have had no involvement with. I can’t believe this shit!!!! You are just shitting around I hope?

 

I’ve heard just about enough of the belly-aching about Glenn falling off the face of the earth and his emails.  Truthfully, it’s not such a bad thing at all.  We as a society have used the Internet from dating to making deals and quite frankly, it really is very impersonal.  Additionally, I think that Glenn’s head is big enough that he is probably doing this for more attention just to solidify his presence in our lives. 

 

Seriously, as a therapist (I play one on TV), it does take time to go through your entire “contact” list and debate on who to send what to.   Personally, I congratulate you Glenn on the first steps of your recovery.  And; as always, one can get their fix at the “minute” and post their views as well when they have fifteen minutes.

 

Big deal, so there aren’t any more “money angels”, or Bill Gates sending you his fortune, or you’re going to die if you don’t forward a particular email right away to 12 of the “people on your contact list”…I too, think that forwarding an email is like giving a gift card…don’t give a shit; and/or, too late to really go shopping for what the person really wants.

 

People, it’s time to join the ranks.  I salute you Mr. Montgomery and your decision. 

 

Your friends in Pennsylvania need your emails, what else are we suppose to look at down here.

 

Never thought you would fold to a couple of critics.  Better to stay, and piss them off.

 

You are full of crap, as soon as someone sends some naked chick that we all need to see you’ll send it.

 

The golden one…….

 

Goodbye to the Email-Class of 2008

 

Glenn, when will there be the first reunion?

 

NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!  Don’t go…..

 

I’m guessing you don’t send the pornography to the women.  Do they really know what they are lobbying for?

 

What a let down. What are you going to do in your spare time and What will I now do???

 

Don Marr is right Glenn, you need to reconsider.  We all need you back!!!

 

Goodmorning

I never had the pleasure of meeting you except through Jon Adams but you and your GREAT material will be greatly missed.All of these seniors here on Hilton Head that I play golf with

won`t know what to do with their computers since you retired from sending all the pics.

Thanks for all the good times.

Robert Hicks

 

 

it’s always been a pleasure to see something in the in-box from Glenn. It usually brings a smile and is a pleasant diversion from the usual bitching & complaining we all get.

 

Please reconsider.

Glenn……………………..PLEASE don’t go……..

People are clearly mourning this loss.

We need ya!

 

 

Cous,

 

Quit destroying everyone’s lives.  Why not just get a yahoo, hotmail, gmail, excite…. free e-mail address.  It goes thru your local internet provide i.e. DSL, Cable etc and not thru Brownstone Insurance’s server.    Do I have to teach you everything?  Or, is it that you have finally found Jesus and the morality of your content is getting the best of you?

Say it isn’t so !!  Nobody kicks my kid brother around like this!  Who are they?  Where are they?  Let me at ‘em…

 

 

Well Monty, you’ll never be removed from my list but I do respect your wishes and intentions. Now, I finally figured out why we connect so well. You see, I could validate from my parochial grammar school yearbook, thru public junior high school and high school that I was also unanimously voted the class clown, too. Even the nuns who told my parents that after 7th grade I should be sent to public school because of my class room antics and behavior. I used to get pulled out into hallways and see my teachers laughed so hard because of my humor but told me that they had to refrain from laughter in the classroom.

 

 

End of an era.

 

Stinks

 

 

monty,

sat it aint so first you quit me as your barber then this do you know how many people count on this young and old

                                                       Thanks for the good times

                                                                       Doug

 

 

Life is over as I know it.

 

I am crushed.

 

I wish you would reconsider however I am sure you know what you are doing and it is probably for the best.

 

I anxiously await what the incarnation of the 21st century will bring.

 

 

You finally really did it. DAMN YOU! GODDAMN YOU ALL TO HELLLLLLLL!!!!! You can forward that to “The Guys” from me. hootch2 That was my best Heston impersonation.  

 

 

That’s sad, so is this effective immediately, don’t we get at least a 30 day notice?

 

What are you talking about? Now what am I supposes to do? lol  Are you going to let them bully you like that?

DONNA

 

Monty

You have been a good soldier, and I will miss the communication, I hope the MontyMinute will live on?

Thanks again for all the hard work.

Joe

 

Monty , Say its not true. I kind of look forward to the jetsam and flotsam that you send out. Yes , it does take a while to download , but in most cases , its worth it. Most of the time they bring a smile to ones face. If this is really the end , how fitting that your last one was ‘ the golf Instructor “. Every time I look at that magnificent body , I’ll remember it was you that introduced her to me. Charlie Its been a good run , from the flight home from Miami , to now. Wow I’m starting to reminisce about the porn?

 

 

 

What the fuck – where am I going to get my free porn from

 

 

I’m screwed, you were my email dealer. 

 

 

that’s crap.

 

remove the offending a-hole(s) and move on.

 

I do not approve.

 

 

it may be the saddest day of all..

 

 

e end of an era my brother.

For whatever crap you took, there were countless more smiles that came from those who enjoyed your worr. 

All that free time should open you up for longer lunches.  Me and The Big Fella will gladly fill the void.

Talk to ya.

 

 

I guess we’ll have to correspond through the Montyminute????

 

Hope to hear from you soon.

 

 

Monty,

Say it isn’t so. I and my contact list look forward to the joy we receive from your emails. You have also made me aware of an unknown world that never ceases to amaze me, these are rarely forwarded to others. I think you call these emails the “G” files?

Hopefully, you will reconsider your decision if not thanks for the laughs. We’ll still have the Monty Minute.

The Lone Ranger

 

Monty,

 

What a bummer – WTF am I going to do now?

 

Thanks for the many laughs over years – Sometimes it was the only thing that got me through a bad day.

 

Thanks again,

-Crazy Dave

 

Glenn:

Go to www.oprah.com and type the word tigger in the web sites search box. Watch the video and ask yourself if your a tigger or an eor and you know if there ever was a tigger your him. I will miss the emails and tell the eor that asked you to stop to go @#&* themselves!

 

Say it aint so….there’s porn stars crying everywhere…if you start up again put me at top of list….

 

 

people are schmucks – I didn’t respond to all but definitely got a chuckle out of just about every one of them (even the ones that scared me…..) if you do start up again make sure you keep me in the loop. 

 

 

 

It’s been a good ride, I remember when  you sent all those faxes to my real estate broker and

told her they were from me….15 years later that lady still laughs about it when she sees me

 

 

 

First and foremost I hope you are OK.  I will not be taking you off my buddy email list as I will still be golfing

boating or simply lunching with you.  Keep that in mind as Spring approaches and I will see if you

 

 

 

 

I am saddened.  The highlight of my day was getting raunchy, pornographic emails from my dad… wait, what?

 

Bummer.

 

 

I just received the crushing news that my main source for funny, pithy, somewhat raunchy and for some of you pornographic e-mails has decided to retire from sending them.

Because of this you will notice a distinct lessening of e-mails from me.

I am truly sorry but this is beyond my control.

The die has been cast.

The desicion has been made.

The Rubicon has been crossed.

The bridges have been burned.

The light has been extinguished.

The fat lady has sung.

That’s all folks.

 

 

Monty

say it’s not true.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I count on your humor to brighten up my pants.

 

 

 

Hi Monty, just wanted you to know that I miss you, haven’t laughed all week.

 

 

You don’t roll over for anybody. 

 

Taking a poll. I waive copyright for Monty Minute   Asked my wife  what

Spitxer got for 5500/ hr.  She said nothing special.

Asking around to see what other wives are answering to same question

 

 

 

Gees you have become boring. 

 

 

 

Thanks again for all of your comments.

 

Your friend

 

Monty

 

 

I luv ya guys!

 

 

 

Beer boy from The Man Show

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