P= Puke

A= Abscense of heart

T= They

S= Suck

What a disaster 0-4 Do not say it does not matter, it is only preseason. When you strap on that helmet, you need to wear it with pride and give 110%. Nobody should be OK with losing.

These guys make millions, or at least are working towards a career making millions.

NO EXCUSES… excuses are like assholes…

They have the easiest schedule in the league, so I am saying 9-7 this year, and out of the playoffs. They will beat KC, but everybody else will too. larry Johnson should run for 125+

Where is Tom Brady? He can’t suit up and sit on the sidelines?

Is he becoming a Prima Donna? blasphemy… I know

The basic problem I see with the upcoming season is as Fester puts it, and I quote ” the team has lost their heart” This coupled with the lack of talent.

The team has had like 35 picks in the last 4 years and have almost nothing to show for it. Give me 5 players from the last 4 drafts. Mayo might work out, but the rest are marginal. Watson, merriwether ( just ok) Who else?

Chad Jackson is the new Marquis Hill( God rest his soul) both second round busts that hang around for years w/o playing. They only stay on the roster because they were 2nd round picks.

How about our free agents this year? Victor hobson? bust, Fernando Bryant? bust. Who else? thats right there is no one else. we did not pick up any, just gave them away. Pioli sucks!

It is no longer about the team, it is about how much money Bob can make off of Patriot Place.

” Destruction of a Dynasty”

Willie Andrews 229 DB Baylor

My friends say i do not have enough sex on my blog:

Sorry, get your own minute.

You know, They might just be right.

My keys are starting to bother me!

I have 11 keys, 4 of those circle rings and one giant key for the car.

The giant key to replace is like $800. It opens the door, locks the door, opens the trunk from 50 yards and will sound a panic alarm as well as open all the windows. Is that worth $800.

The weird part is that I do not have to use the key to start the car, or to lock it. You walk up to the car and it opens, then you get in and push a button to start the car, then when you leave, you push a button to shut it off, then it locks itself when you get 100 feet from the car.

So why the fuck do I need a $800 key? They should have put a chip in my arm when I left the dealership, or a card I can put in my wallet

Anyway, I can only identify 8 of the 11 keys. i do not know what the other 4 are for, but I am afraid to throw them away?? Is that wrong.

Another thing, I have 4 of those swipe things on my key ring. When did that happen? Do I get screwed over, if i go to stop & shop and don’t use it? The others I do not use, but I might.

I do not have any of those stupid add ons on my ring, like penlights, or furry animals, I think I have enough.

Check your keys, I bet you do not know what they all go to.

Famous keys:

Alicia Keys

Francis Scott key

Florida keys

Monk keys

Key Lime Pie ( from Jimmy)

What am I missing here?

besides a brain?

Congratulations to my friend frank today. On his Bah Mitzvah they said today you are a man. BUT today at the age of 73 he has turned another page and gone on the internet for the first time.

SO, Frank, today you are officially a pervert. You can now surf the web for porn like every pimple faced 14 year old in the country.

What took you so long? Was it the Money? From this day forward you can be hooked. That is if you can follow my directions and are able to Google search, or insert a www into the URL?

There is definitely a chance you might not be reading this, as you were not able to follow my directions.

REMEMBER: You only need to have two favorites on your bookmark… www.themontyminute.com and www.pornhub.com The rest is just crap.

Good luck and congratulations on your new squeeze ( the one in the picture) and finally getting on the net.

Next thing we need to teach you is email. Beware, I have a LARGE library to send you.

Who would of thunk?

I am so proud of my brother. he is smart, good looking and funny. One thing he is not is 58 as is reported in the paper. I wonder who gave them that info. Maybe I should add delusional and vain ( haha) never. My brother is the BEST!!!!

Playbill Boston publisher helps local arts groups look to the East

By Geoff Edgers, Globe Staff  |  August 26, 2008

This week, as Boston Ballet undertakes its first tour of South Korea, one man back here will be watching intently. He is Tim Montgomery, the former Boston magazine publisher and longtime president of Jerome Press, which publishes Playbill Boston magazine.

Montgomery isn’t plotting out how to write up the event. He’s trying to sell it.

The 58-year-old is principal and co-producer of New Venture Entertainment, a recently formed production company created to import arts and culture to South Korea. He hopes the Boston Ballet tour, which includes four performances in Seoul on Saturday and Sunday, will be the first of many to showcase local institutions. Talks have already been held with the Museum of Fine Arts and Boston Pops.

“There’s clearly a lot of activity in Southeast Asia,” Montgomery said in a recent interview at his Congress Street offices. “The whole world seems to be tipping there and they have a real appetite for American culture.”

For the groups Montgomery has approached, the notion of working with New Venture Entertainment is almost a no-brainer. The company is paying the entire $400,000 to $500,000 cost of bringing 38 members of Boston Ballet to South Korea, and therefore takes the risk if the shows don’t sell out. (Montgomery won’t give specifics about the Seoul ticket sales, other than that they are selling “slightly below expectations.”)

The Pops has been trying to contain costs for its touring operation by flying less and traveling more by bus and truck. The idea of a fully-funded trip East is attractive, Pops leaders say, as they look for new ways to spread word of the orchestra. And the MFA could do a photography exhibit as soon as 2009.

“We are very grateful that he approached us for a show in a place we’ve never done any touring exhibitions before,” said Danielle Berger, manager of touring exhibitions at the MFA. “Having someone like Tim – who knows the market in Korea, has the connection to the best museums in Korea, and speaks our language – those are great advantages.”

New Venture Entertainment came about through a chance meeting. Company founder Don Kwon, who lives in Seoul, attended Boston College before starting a venture capital fund back home. Tadd Rosenfeld, the Miami-based grandson of Jerome Press chairman Jerome Rosenfeld, worked with Kwon in New York at one point, and introduced him to Montgomery and to Rita Fucillo, director of marketing and public relations for Playbill.

Among Kwon’s goals was to find investments for Koreans who wanted to get into the American entertainment business. He needed help scouting the States, and knew of the senior Rosenfeld’s long history, both running theaters and publishing Playbill and Panorama, a publication largely distributed in hotels.

Montgomery recognized the attraction of having foreign money pumped into American shows so they could eventually play Korea. He formed New Venture Entertainment with Tadd Rosenfeld in 2005. Kwon formed separate branches of New Venture in South Korea and Tokyo.

So far, New Venture has taken its lumps with a series of financially unsuccessful investments, including a touring production of “Dr. Dolittle” and the Broadway musical “Cry Baby,” which closed in June after 113 performances.

But Montgomery notes New Venture Entertainment is a virtual start-up, and is more concerned with presenting performances to build a customer base. The company did secure the rights to “Cry Baby” for Southeast Asia.

As part of his scouting mission, Montgomery talked to Kwon about viewing Boston as a brand of its own.

“We have the Boston Symphony, the Boston Ballet, the Museum of Fine Arts. We have the Boston Pops,” said Montgomery. “Don immediately seized on that and wanted to bring the Boston Pops to Seoul.”

That proved too difficult to do quickly. Montgomery knew Boston Ballet, hot off last summer’s six-week tour of Spain – its first overseas tour in 15 years – would be eager to hit the road again. He also knew that a theater was available in Seoul in August. Kirsten Hwang, the company manager who oversees touring for Boston Ballet, said she was surprised by the accelerated pace with which New Venture moved.

“Our Spain tour was three years in the making,” she said. “When I first met [Montgomery] in November, I remember thinking, ‘That’ll be a first for me having to put together an international tour in less than a year’s time.’ ”

The MFA’s Berger has also been impressed by Montgomery’s energy. Right now, the museum is hoping to send its “Karsh 100: A Biography in Images” show to Seoul after it closes at the MFA in January 2009.

The Pops also looks forward to continuing discussions with Montgomery.

“We’re at a point in the economy when it’s very, very difficult to get sponsorships,” said Dennis Alves, the organization’s director of artistic planning. “A lot of companies have really cut back, so the fact this gentleman is doing this, it’s fantastic. It’s sort of a light at the end of the tunnel.”

Geoff Edgers can be reached at gedgers@globe.com. 

 Skippy takes the dogs out for a cruise…

Life jackets on!! Safety first…

If P is for Puke, A is for abscense of heart.

You might guess if the PATS keep stinking the place out, that the “TS” will stand for THEY SUCK!!

No long rant today, I just want to point out a few things as the dynasty crumbles.

You need three ingrediants to win football games:

1) a great coach

2) a great quarterback

3) Heart

The Pats have a great coach, they have a great quarterback, what they now lack might be the most important ingrediant Heart. they lost it.

If you are a football player, you have to line up on your side of the ball and kick the snot out of the  guy on the other side. You have to want it more than the other guy. It is intimidating, and this is how the Pats have won most of their games.

Contrary to popular belief, they do not nearly have the talent of  50% of the teams in the NFL. They merely had more heart (and a good QB and coach) .

Where did the heart go? I do not know, but it is natural I guess that after all that winning, comes complacancy.

Did you ever want something so bad, that you worked your ass off to get it? and when you got it it was great, but you were not willing to put that same spirit into doing it again?

Ever save for a vacation, and when you got there, it was evreything you wanted and expected? You had a great time, but the next time, it just wasnt worth the effort to save the money, or it just wasn’t the same.

This is what has happened to the pats.

The Vets have experienced it and do not have the heart to do what it takes to get there again, and the kids and scrapheap vets  are a little sick of the stories about the glory years.

It is hard to watch a team lose their heart…………….

Matt Cassel has proven nothing and needs to go fishing. He can come back when someone gets hurt, He will not be picked up by anyone, unless Whitman/Hanson high school needs a QB.

Lawrence maroney needs to hit a hole.

The Defense needs to blitz more.

The Offensive line needs to stop thinking about fishing and hunting and hit somebody.

Brady needs to come back.

Harrison and Bruschi need to stop playing pig pile and make the first hit. Watch the replays. someone makes a tackle and these two 11 year olds jump on the pile.

I will have weekly prognastications, so if you have a bookie, call him, by the end of the season, you can retire.

Monty

Imagine you had to pick a dad for a day. Who would it be?

Homer Simpson or Peter griffin? or even that closet perv Mr Rogers?

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Another in a series of who is hotter?

Does it come down to blonde vs. brunette?

Is it the personality?

If you could sleep with one who would it be? if you married one who would it be? If you went out for drinks and were hanging out for the weekend who would it be?

Who had it worse? think about it? you hung around all day with horny little dwarfs named sleepy and dopey, or you lived in the attic with a control freak mom and two bitchy sisters?

You know they both got down and dirty. Both of them could cook and clean like a mail order bride from Russia.

This might be a tough one.

Snow White? or Cinderella?

I played golf with a couple of friends the other day down the cape @ Quashnett valley.

Good course, fun to play. I shot 91 and only lost about 4 balls. I played with this guy Scott from Wisconsin that sells cattle for a living. I am not going to lie! He lost 53 balls, an won all the money. Go figure. He sandbagged us with his handicap till the money was on the line. he had 3 pars in the last 5 holes, along with a closest to the pin on the 4th carry over hole.

I just hate it when I get a taste of my own medicine. It is usually me handing out the shit.

The other two guys were Plumbers, so you know they could afford to lose. name me a plumber that is not a millionaire, or a soon to be one.

The meat guy had brought a big ziplock bag of beef jerky that he made in his basement. I tried it. It was the best damn stuff I ever ate. I am not a” jerky guy “( no jokes here) but it was fantastic. I am hooked. I ate tons, it went down well with the tons of drinks we consumed.

Golf, pool and then some boccie on the Cape. Throw in some rum and coke, and it makes for a long ride home, and a longer day in the office the next day.

Call me, I am ready to play again soon and I have to use my minimum at PCC, so lets play.

Monty

” lost a bag of balls, won all the money, but makes good jerky”

Two of Amy’s fav’s

” the old guy tried to keep up with the Montman” BEWARE!!

A woman in her forties went to a plastic surgeon for a
face-lift. The surgeon told her about a new procedure
called ‘The Knob,’ where a small knob is placed on the
top of a woman’s head and can be turned to tighten up
her skin to produce the effect of a brand new face
lift. Of course the woman wanted ‘The Knob.’

Over the course of the years, the woman kept
tightening the knob, and the effects were wonderful, and the woman remained
young-looking and vibrant. After fifteen years, the
woman returned to the surgeon with two problems.
< BR>’All these years, everything has been working just
fine. I’ve had to turn the knob many times and I’ve always loved the
results. But now, I’ve developed two annoying
problems: First, I have these terrible bags under my eyes and the knob won’t
get rid of them ‘

The doctor looked at her closely and said, ‘Those
aren’t bags, those are your breasts.’

‘Well,’ She said, ‘I guess there’s no point in asking about the goatee.’

A man had lost one of his arms in an accident.
  One day he felt terribly depressed and decided to commit suicide.
  He got into an elevator and went to the top of a building to jump off.

  He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man
skipping along, whistling and kicking up his heels.

He said, ‘I’m NOT happy …. my ass itches.’

Did you see that so called exhibition game last night?

You say Monty, just calm the fuck down, it is only an exhibition game. WELL for one I paid $1850.00 for my seats to these exhibition games, so they should show me something. What a waste of money. Thank you again BOB KRAFT for sucking more money out of my wallet.

The only exhibition here was an exhibit of how this team has lost their heart and laugh about it on the sidelines.

Breaking news!!!

The patriots pick up another aging white guy. They have now cornered the market on white guys. Maybe they can get John Lynch to grow a beard and get a flannel shirt and Play the offensve line ( the french connection should be their new name, they retreat at every snap)

I fear for this team for these reasons:

1) they lost their heart, and so did the fans, it is becoming the quietest stadium in the NFL. Too much winning has caught up to both sides. Never mind the Kraft todies in the club seats, who do not even know a game is going on.

2) O line ( french connection) sucks.

3) defensive backfield scares the shit out of me. Hobbs plays 10 yards off of everybody, and he is supposed to be our best.

4) The QB Matt. I would not wipe my feet on either of the two Matt’s. I kinda like oconnell. he shows something. Remember when Bledsoe was here ( the dark years) He would come in for the beginning of the game and suck, and then this new kid Brady would come in and light it up? He did believe me. These new guys ( white) are the pits we may as well mail it in if Brady goes down, and he will a lot with that line.

5) Lawrence maroney- would everybody stop calling him a front line runner. He is a street punk from St Louis. He sucks. he can shuck and Jive all he wants with his dreads, but my back hits the line and moves the pile. A running back for the pats should get 10 yards a carry. nobody plays the run when they play against Brady and Moss. Imagine if he had to play in an offense where they knew he was going to run, he would not get 30 yards.

6) any team that starts Teddy Bruschi has no chance.

Interesting watching the game last night. My directv went out and i could not get a signal. so i find some rabbit ears. Ya I still got em. Then I try them on every TV, but they do not work on the new TV’S, so I go down to the basement and in the back of the closet, I have this old 13 inch tv ( emerson) it is 25 -30 years old. I turn it on and voila I get a fuzzy picture. I attach the rabbit ears and it clears up slightly. So I am watching the game on a 13 inch tv that looks more like a white swan in a snowstorm than a NFL game. I have no clicker and have to suffer through all those commercials. But, I stuck it out till the last play.

Now through all my complaining, that is a real fan. Believe me when i tell you, this is frustrating watching the dynasty crumble, it is killing me.

ALERT!!!

Where are all our 40 draft picks from the last 5 years?

I like my man Sean Crable  #98 From the great University of Michigan ( didn’t Tom Brady go there?)

A father put his three year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which she ended by saying:  ”God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma and good-bye Grandpa.”

She said “You think you had a bad day, you’ll never believe what happened to me. This morning I was in the middle of a golf lesson and my golf pro dropped dead!”

Played golf and drank with some of the GGG guys.

We were thinking that the waitress at the club looked like Ellie May Clampett

What do you think?

\

The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex. *
> > This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you
> > both have sex until you are blue in the face
> >
> > The 2nd kind of sex is called: Kitchen Sex. *
> > This is when you have been with your partner for a short time
> > and you are so needy you will have sex anywhere, even in the
> > kitchen.
> >
> > The 3rd kind of sex is called: Bedroom Sex. *
> > This is when you have been with your partner for a long time.
> > Your sex has gotten routine and you usually have sex only in your
> > bedroom.
> >
> > The 4th kind of sex is called: Hallway Sex *
> > This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When
> > you pass each other in the hallway you both say ’screw you.’
> >
> > The 5th kind of sex is called: Religious Sex. *
> > Which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun in the afternoon
> > and Nun at night.(Very Popular)
> >
> > The 6th kind is called Courtroom Sex. *
> > This is when you cannot stand your wife any more. She takes you
> > to court and screws you in front of everyone.
> >
> > And last, but not least, The 7th kind of sex is called: Social
> > Security Sex. *
> > You get a little each month But not enough to enjoy your self.
> >

Remember the Beverly Hillbillies?

Who was hotter Ellie may Clampett or that hot secratery of mr Drysdales Jane hatheway?

I kinda always had the hots for jane Hatheway.

take the poll :

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He claims ” they looked perfectly good to him”

It has been four days now, and i am already bored to tears. Like the winter Olympics and their endless torturous hours of figure skating, now we get another made for woman marathon of gymnastics.

Who gives a shit about these little robots that have been weened since birth to bend like licorice, and to twist like chubby checker. Why do the Chinese look like starved dwarfs, and the USA chicks look like they have been on roids for years. Check the thighs on these pre teens. They have schnecks too. There is someting wong with their manufactured bodies.

I turned it on the other night, and I got beach volleyball with cheerleaders in bikinis. Come on now. That is just bullshit.

There are other stupid sports that are ruining the integrity of the olympics. I am all set with:

archery

Badmitton ( last night they said they will go through 725 cases of cocks) As Joe said to me this morning, ” that’s a lot of cocks”

canoing

handball

softball

ping pong

One last thing that is a joke and a bore is the Basketball. we send over a pile of multi millionaires to play Angola and tansinia. My guess is that maybe we will win. What do you think. Do the players get to bring their posse’s?? Do they have good prices on Bling over there in China. They can load up on MR “T” jewelry.

What I do like about the olympics, is the old school stuff. I like:

Boxing

running ( lots of running. The other countries actually have white people competing against the black guys and girls. That is just stupid). How do those 100 yard dash guys run in those Lycra suits with that giant package bobbin around in front. that would be like a gymnast twisting around with double DD’S. If they have a photo finish, their prick will pass the line 1 second before they do.

jumping

swimming ( not synchronized either) That Phelps guy is a freak. He is awesome. Have you seen the underwater camera views on him? He is like a freakin fish. I would like to see him rack up the medals.

Well enjoy the endless show while it lasts. It is just one big money making event, for the countries, the television people and the millions of others who are associated with the sports. Take it for what it is. It is anything but an amateur event with people playing for pride and prowess.

Monty

This is a short note to the blog. Much like the credit card swipe that I never get right the first time.

Why is it that if there are two ways to put a plug in a socket, I seem to get it wrong 80% of the time. Is it me? I am always trying to jam the fat end into the small hole.

Why do they call it a “male end” and a ” female end ” ? Never mind, i think i figured that part out.

Do you have the same results? do you look at the plug before sticking it in?