Entries from May 2009 ↓

Stars is no star

I have had breakfast , lunch and just drinks at Stars in Hingham.

Food is ordinary, I know 3 people that I have eaten there with that have been sick after.

The Location is fantastic. Too bad the food does not live up.

Parking is tough, and despite the ordinary food, there is usually a wait. Thank God for location, location, location.

Stars gets one monty Star out of five

*

Avoid it if you can. there are better options. If Tosca, the liberty, or the square cafe is open, try them first.

200 Quincy Ave
Braintree, MA 02184
(781) 849-1577

There are not many places I have not eaten. If you know me, no jokes.

especially when I have heard for years how good a place is.

I decided to find out for myself the other night. I had dinner with 9 friends.

The place was dead, but when I walked in, the bartender yells out “HEY MONTY”  no surprise to anybody that I know a bartender.

Sudsy set us up with drinks and Diedre hooked us up with menu’s

Good service, good selection and fair prices.

Everything on the menu including the bread with the olive oil and hummas are made on the premises, so it is all fresh.

I had the wedge and a half order of shrimp,broccoli over angel hair. Isn’t it nice to be able to order a half order. Not many people can eat the whole thing at an italian restaurant and it saves you money and allows you an opportunity to have dessert or another drink.

My meal was excellent. Mrs Monty had the sweet potato ravioli, which 3 others did also. she says that they were superb.

Don had 5 of Sudsy’s clear chocolate martini’s and he said they were delicious. I do not know what he had to eat, but either did he after 5

Sudsy

martini’s. I think it was the clam chowder and the veal parm.

Danny says that he has not had veal parm ( the crispy kind) that good in ten years.

Overall it was a big success and I would and will go back again.

The only down sides, were that no one really liked the hot molten lava chocolate cake. It was neither hot nor molten nor very good. Oh Ya Don said that the birdbath glasses that the martini’s came in were a little small.

Even Donna did not complain (amazing) So it must be good.

4 monty stars ****  4/5

Does this charade bother anybody but me?

Every time I turn on the TV in the last week, all I see are nerdy little kids spelling  these huge words that nobody knows.

Here is a typical scenario

A pre puberty kid with his pants pulled up over his belly button stands up and some older geek with horned rim glasses behind a computer says

“HYDRARGYRUM”

THE KID REPEATS IT 6 TIMES AND SAYS REPEAT IT PLEASE, THEN HE SAYS CAN YOU GIVE ME A DEFINITION? THEN HE SAYS ARE THERE ANY OTHER PRONUNCIATIONS? THEN HE SAYS WHAT ARE THE ROOT SOURCES?

THEN HE SAYS HYDRARGYRUM AGAIN AND AGAIN, THEN HE PRETENDS TO WRITE IT IN HIS HAND.

Now I am about to strangle the little pimple faced asshole, cause i know he knows how to spell it. He has been holed up in his room since he has been two, by two overly  overbearing librel democratic parents that have no life, who feed him by shoving food under the door.

So the kid says H-Y D-A-R-G-R-Y-R-U-M  HYDRAGYRUM, JUST LIKE D HE HAS SPELLED IT IN HIS ROOM WITH THE POSTERS OF EINSTEIN ON THE WALL FOR THE LAST 6 YEARS.

he sits down and the next geek gets up.

By the way, is this a international spelling bee? it must be, because every kid is Chinese, Vietnamese Philippinese, or an Indian. Jesus Christ cant American kids spell?

This goes on for days weeks and months till one little geeky kid wins. he goes back to school and gets stuffed in the locker and life goes on.

Someday when i am working for this little wiz kid, I hope he does not bring up this blog.

monty

the winner

Her name is Kavya SHIVASHANAKAR

I will give you 5 bucks if you can even spell her name. You get three clues.

pronunciation

definition

language origin

try writing it in your palm……

“OBAMA”

I BOUGHT ME A CASE OF BEER AND DRANK IT OBAMA SELF

So you think you’re so smart.
Let’s see how computer literate you are .. ….

*WHAT WOULD CAUSE THIS TO HAPPEN?:*

*Qqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqdjggsdqklgds *

*Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffkgmgqkfjd
*

* Mqielgqfffffffffffffffffffffffffffsqfmq </FONT>*

*lor:#0000A0″>Dsldmfqsfqssfdbvnlklfvnozeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ? *

*SEE THE ANSWER BELOW!
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keyboard crash

Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a little stroll in town one
afternoon enjoying the sunshine. As they walked, they came across a sign:

“Beauty contest for the most beautiful woman in the world.”

“I am entering!” said Snow White.

After half an hour she comes out and they ask her, “Well, how’d ya do?”

“I won First Place !,” said Snow White.

They continue walking and they see another sign:

“Contest for the strongest man in the world.”

“I’m entering,” says Superman.

After half an hour, he returns and they ask him, “How did you make out?”

“I won First Place too,” answers Superman. “Did you ever have a doubt?”

They continue walking when they see a third sign:

“Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?” Pinocchio quickly enters
the contest.

After half an hour he returns with tears in his eyes.

“What happened?” they asked.

“Who the hell is Nancy Pelosi?” asked Pinocchio.

An Amish boy and his father were in a mall.
They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, ‘What is this Father?’

The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, ‘Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life. I don’t know what it is’.

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order.

Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blonde stepped out.

The father said quietly to his son…..’Go get your mother’.

I have been living in Massachusetts my whole life, and it has just dawned on me how difficult it must be to come into this state and figure out how to talk.

Let’s take the towns of Massachusetts.

There are 20 something towns in the state that end in “HAM”

So what is the proper way to sound it out?

Ham or Hum?

I have figured it out!              It is simple really.

Here is how it goes. If you are a shitball town with good working class people, you pronounce it “HAM”

If you are a snobby rich town full of frauds and uppity folks, you pronounce it Hum……………..

Let’s see if I am right.

HUM TOWNS:

Hingham

Chatham

Wenham

Wrentham

HAM TOWNS:

Framingham

Bellingham

Wareham

Eastham

Waltham

Petersham

Tyringham

Then there are the wannabe ham towns that are really hum towns and the upper crust says hum and the townies pronounce it ham.

Wannabe’s

Oakham

Dedham

Raynham

Stoneham

You are now in the know. You know what I know. So when you get to a town that ends in “HAM” look around and see who lives there, and what the house’s are like. Does it have a village, or a center? All tell tale signs on how to say the name.

For instance, here is a pizza parlor in Framingham and one in Hinghum

Hingh"ham" Pizza " The Upper Crust"

Framingham pizza

“Dear God, this year please send clothes for all those poor ladies in Daddy’s computer,

Amen.”

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation.

The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:

‘Emma come First. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more! Two asses, They come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one Lasta Time.’

The lady can’t take this any more, ‘You foul-mouthed sex obsessed pig.’ She Retorted indignantly. ‘In this country, we don’t speak aloud in Public Places about our sex lives.’

‘Hey, coola down lady, ‘ said the man. ‘Who talkin’abouta sex? I’m a Justa Tellin my frienda how to spell ‘ Mississippi ‘,

$5.00 says you’re gonna read this again!**

Women are like
apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men
don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and
getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that
aren’t as good, but easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with
them, when in reality, they’re amazing. They just have to wait for the right
man to come along, the one who is brave enough to climb all the way to the top
of the tree.

Now Men….. Men are like a fine wine. They begin as
grapes, and it’s up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn
into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Share this with all the
good apples you
know.

What are you waiting for?

This is a public service announcement.

get it now

I don’t know why everyone would not have one of these by now.

They are free, and all you have to do is pay as you go. You have to pay anyway.

No fiddling for change. No long lines. No toll booth lines.

They work in most states. and you can even use them for parking at the train.

Why would you not have one of these? AQfter a TIVO, this would be the number one thing I suggest that everyone have.

Her is the link for a free transponder.  CLICK HERE.

I was in Northborough the other day and I was wondering?
If there is a Southborough, and a Northborough, and a Westborough. Where the hell is Eastborough???
Does that make sense?
And why do people Spell them different. Sometimes it is boro and sometimes it is borough. The GPS lists both.

That is just stupid.

While I am at it.
East Boston
South Boston

Hellllloooo! Where is West Boston? There is a south End. a north end & a West end Where is the East end.
What is an END??

Why do I even think about this shit.

Monty

Happy Memorial Day.

Never look a gift horse in the mouth!!

h

gift horse

Stories behind Famous Sayings

The Saying: DON’T LOOK A GIFT HORSE IN THE MOUTH.

Who Said It: St. Jerome

When: 400 A.D.

The Story behind It: This proverb is based on the fact that a horse’s value is determined by his age, which, in turn, can be roughly determined by an examination of his teeth. The message conveyed is that a gift should be appreciated for the thought and spirit behind it, not according to its value. St. Jerome, who never accepted payment for his writings, first used the phrase in reply to his literary critics. His exact words: “Never inspect the teeth of a gift horse.”

click her for the link and video

Clothed girl friendly

I turned on the game last night just as Big Poppi was up with 2 outs after going 0-2.

He got his bat out in front and the ball dropped over the wall. whew! It had been since last september 22nd before he got lucky.

Thank God the guy was throwing meatballs at the time. I think the next 3 batters got up and abused that pitcher. Was it the end of a streak of homerless games? or was it the end of a pitcher that was just throwing BP?

I still think BIg Poppi is done. Too bad nice guy.

Which brings me to the number one killer of professional athletes. It is not injury, or drugs, or apathy. It is AGE>>>

AGE is the number one reason a athlete fails. Look around. There is an age when players slide and slide fast. see Teddy bruschi, and Ray Allan, and Mike Timlin, and anybidy else who hits that number or age that brings them down.

It sucks to get old.

Dont hold your breath waiting for David to start hiting dingers like arod. He is at the end of the line.

I do like the guy, just my opinion. What is yours? That is what the comments section is for.

Monty

I heard this debate the other day on the radio.

Here is my take on it.

IT IS RBIZE!!!!   IT HAS TO BE PLURAL…..

This is how I grew up. I said RBI’S.  Then some politically correct ass said that it is grammatically incorrect to say RBI’S

Fooey I say  I am sick and tired of these PC assholes anyway. I am sticking with rbize..

You do what you want.

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Jos. A. Bank

94 Derby Street

Hingham, Ma 02043

tel# 781-740-9814

This blog is usually a forum for me to bitch and complain about stuff.

But sometimes you have to report on the really great things that happen to you.

One such event was my experience at Jos A Bank at the Derby Street Mall in Hingham.

I was a “Men’s Wearhouse guy” I have been buying clothes from them for a long time. I was getting a little tired of the sketchy sales guy who always tried to put this portly and mature man in a orange shirt and a purple tie.

They said ” dude, this is the style now” talk about not knowing your client.

As you know, I have a college degree in fashion merchandising, so no way was I  falling for that scam.

Anyway. I received a shirt from Banks for Christmas. It felt good and fit good, so when I needed another shirt, I headed to Jos A. Bank in Hingham .

Serendipity happened.

Serendipity is the effect by which one accidentally discovers something fortunate, especially while looking for something else entirely.

I met Kathy Ayers ( the store manager) she took me under her wing and before I knew it, I had bought three suits, three shirts and two ties. I did the buying, she was low key and just helped me make the decisions I wanted to make.Remember I only went in for a shirt.

There was one point, where I told her I was a size 50 jacket and she said ” no way”  ” it must be muscle, do you lift weights? “  what a schmoozer.

I love Kathy. She was extraordinary.

Kathy Store Manager

NOOO! I do not know her, or I did not get anything FREE!, but I do believe in calling out people for doing the job right.

This blog gets read by over 20,000 people per year. If you are one of them. go see Kathy and tell her MONTY sent you.

On a recent trip – as I booked into a hotel , I said to the receptionist, “I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled.”

“No,” she says, “it’s regular porn… you sick bastard.”