everybody poops. just where is the question

Your away from home, and you have to go.

Where? OMG Where do you go? I have thought about this a lot. as any traveling person would.

Here is my quick list of spots.

Five Best places

1. A Casino- if you are near a casino, go for it. Super clean. lots of stall choices, you even get some person to hand you a towel after you wash your hands. ( how do you apply for this job? )
2. A hotel- any hotel, but the better the hotel, the better the venue.
3. Restaurant- see #2  the better the restaurant, the more pleasant.  A restaurant that is not busy is preferable
4. Fast food places- Don’t tell me you have not. Your a liar. They have to be clean, or they would get in trouble. Go for it.
5. Coffee shop- Dunkin Donuts, or starbucks. the price of admission is a cup of coffee. Just wondering? HMM do you get wi-fi in the john?

Five worst places

1. The jobsite in the 5 gallon bucket.
2. on a boat especially a small boat
3. any port-o-potty
4. sporting event/concert/night club
5. rest areas or gas stations

Any of the above in a foreign country can be a sketchy idea.

My advice? Hold it till you get home. But if you gotto go, take my advice.

For more pooping adice, see the following links:

pooping at work

Toilet paper survey

Bring back the courtesy match This was a favorite of my dads. He never went into the bathroom without a pack of matches. You could always hear my mom in the kitchen yell ” for christ sakes Bill would you light a match.”

1. Your car breaks down in the middle of the woods and you are 40 miles from civilization
2. You joined the marines
3. your camel dies and you are 40 miles from the next oasis
4. You are just NUTS
5. You are a bunch of woman dressed in pink and are doing a good thing to raise money for Breast cancer

For three years now Mrs Monty and her foolish friends ( The Berry Breast friends) have  trained, and fundraised just to walk 40 miles to raise money for breast cancer. I think it is more than that, I think it has something to do with feeling good about yourself, and doing something good. I think they get such a good feeling about themselves and what they are doing that it overcomes the pain and makes it sound almost sensible to them.

 Loading ...

I try to do my part to first understand why they do it, try to help fundraise. Get up at 5:00 to drive them in and pick them up. But I am not going to ever walk 40 miles unless it is one of the other four reasons.

It is actually quite a scene when you drop them off. It is organized like a fortune 500 company. AIG and GM would not be getting bailed out if these woman were running their companies.

1000′s of pink clad menaposal woman in black stretchy pants walking 40 miles. Go figure? If i was JOJO and the last time I did it they had to rip my toenails out, well that would have been the last time.

I dont get it, but good luck to them and the Red Sox. I will be there to pick them up when they are done.

Good luck, I am here to offer any service I can. I would like to voluteer to do a free breast exam for any of the woman that think it could be helpful. It is the least I could do.

Avon Walk

A guest reataurant review

by EW Franklin Ma

Harbourside Café

Sea Pines Resort

Harbour Town

Hilton Head, SC

For the past three years I have taken a vacation week in Hilton Head, SC with my family at one of the rental homes inside the Sea Pines Resort. All in all, it’s a wonderful spot for couples, families, golfers, beachgoers, etc…

A highly anticipated activity for the week is to have a lunch or two at the Harbourside Café. This is an outside bar/restaurant that is very casual but has the perfect combination of shade/sun and an incredible view of the famous Harbour Town Marina.

The menu is simple and has something for everyone in the group. The drinks are great, and like most places in the South I can have a sweet tea. Trust me – it’s worth the calories.

I can still remember my first lunch here three years ago like it was yesterday. I ordered the Fried Fish Sandwich and was treated to the perfect combination of just caught fried grouper, a delicious bun, some incredible banana peppers, a light tartar sauce, lettuce, tomato, and surrounded by a moat of fries. Anyone who has heard me talk about Hilton Head has heard me talk about this sandwich. It was that good.

This brings me to my most recent visit last week. To my horror, the menu was noticeably different from past trips. My instinct told me this would be a problem but I hoped that it had the potential to improve upon past visits. Deep down I knew this would be asking a lot.

Yes, you read correctly. My perfect sandwich is now called the Fried Grouper “Finger” Sandwich. I knew I was in for disappointment, but I had no idea how big it would be.

Somehow, the creative culinary geniuses in their quest to increase profits decided to take the appetizer and simply throw it on a bun with some veggies and side packets of tartar sauce. Not good. They should have called it the Fried Grouper “Middle Finger” sandwich

Well, needless to say this is not a sandwich. I proceeded to discard the bun and go at it as it was intended on the appetizer list, but the disappointment was too great. Thankfully other members of our group loved the café and you simply can’t argue with the surroundings.

While this stop went from a 10 to a 7 on my rating scale, I still encourage you to visit this stop if you ever find yourself in Harbour Town. Just get a hot dog, a sweet tea, and watch the day go by in one of the most beautiful spots on the east coast – and don’t forget to leave some scraps for the birds!

comment from Monty ” they screwed the poor guy. The man flew his whole family to Hilton Head for two things. He was hoping to have a little hotel sex with the wife, and to get one of those succulent fish sandwiches that he craved so much. He got fooled, deceived and disappointed. I feel his pain. I hate it when you love something and not only do you crave it, but you cannot stop talking about it. Then you bring friends and they look at you like you are nuts.Because it is different than what you remembered.

I sure hope the Hotel sex was good, or this dude had one bad vacation. ( I also heard he did not break 80 at Harbour Town )

The current menu:

Here is was some others have said:

If you like to have your 2 year olds picked on and laughed at then this is the place for you. The NASTY fat bald loser of a “musician” that was playing music the night we went thought it was funny to pick on a 2 year old girl and make her move her chair because it was to close too his tip jar. This place is a blast and great fun, so much that kept me up all night thinking about how mean someone was to my child. Yeah! … great family atmosphere….. try shelter cove or the salty dog cafe… at least they never made my kids cry. If they were negative stars that is what this place deserves

can only address breakfast after church, ,, if the bayside location weren’t right in front, it’d be 2 stars, ,, svce’s ok & food quality’s the same, ,, decent, but not worth a 20 …‎

Monty

Master Carpenter

Who woulda thunk that ole Billy was a master carpenter and could do kitchens and baths from scratch?

Check out his website www.compropmgmt.com

Commonwealth Property Management LLC
P. O. Box 65-0235
Newton, MA 02465

Bill Dempsey ( Friend of Monty)

You know what bothers me?

People that say that they are not on commission. And you know they are. They are lying. They think that if you say that, then you are not being high pressure.

If you are not on commission, then you are pooling the commissions, or your job still depends on you selling the product.

Test them. When the car guy says ” I am not on commission” say ” fine, then please write up this contract with that guys name. Then point to some other random guy.

It might not be commission, but everybody needs to sell and everybody wants to get credit for selling it.

Call it pay, commission, pooled money or incentives. It is all commission.

To all my valued EMPLOYEES
There have been some rumblings around the office
about the future of this company, and more specifically, your job. As
you know, the economy has changed for the worse and presents many
challenges. However, the good news is this: The economy doesn’t pose a
threat to your job. What does threaten your job however, is the changing
political landscape in this country.
>
> However, let me
tell you some little tidbits of fact which might help you decide what is
in your best interests.
>
> First, while it is easy to spew
rhetoric that casts employers against employees, you have to understand
that for every business owner there is a Back Story. This back story is
often neglected and overshadowed by what you see and hear. Sure, you see
me park my Lexus LS 460 outside. You’ve seen my big home, and the SeaRay
I’m sure; all these flashy icons of luxury conjure up
some idealized thoughts about my life.
>
>
>
However, what you don’t see is the BACK STORY :
>
> I
started this company 26 years ago. At that time, I lived in a 300 square
foot studio apartment for 3 years. My entire living apartment was
converted into an office so I could put forth 100% effort into building
a company, which by the way, would eventually employ you.
>

> My diet consisted of Mac & Cheese from a box because every dollar I
spent went back into this company. I drove a rusty Plymouth Valiant with a
defective transmission. I didn’t have time for anything. Often times, I
stayed home on weekends, while my friends went out drinking and
partying. In fact, I was married to my business — hard work,
discipline, and sacrifice.
>
> Meanwhile, my friends got
jobs. They worked 40 hours a week and made a modest $50K a year working for the phone company and
spent every dime they earned. They drove flashy cars and lived in
expensive homes and wore fancy designer clothes. Instead of hitting the
Nordstrom’s for the latest hot fashion item, I was trolling through the
discount store extracting any clothing item that didn’t look like it was
birthed in the 70′s. My friends refinanced their mortgages and lived a
life of luxury. I, however, did not. I put my time, my money, and my
life into a business with a vision that eventually, someday, I too, will
be able to afford these luxuries my friends supposedly had.
>

> So, while you physically arrive at the office at 9am , mentally
check in at about noon , and then leave at 5pm , I don’t. There is no
“off” button for me. When you leave the office, you are done and you
have a weekend all to yourself. I unfortunately do not have the freedom.
I eat, and breathe this company every minute of the day. There is no
rest. There is no weekend. There is no happy hour. Every day this
business is attached to my hip like a 1 year old special-needs child.
You, of course, only see the fruits of that garden — the nice house,
the Lexus, the vacations… you never realize the Back Story and the
sacrifices I’ve made.
>
> Now, the economy is falling apart
and I, the guy that made all the right decisions and saved his money,
have to bailout all the people who didn’t. The people that overspent
their paychecks suddenly feel entitled to the same luxuries that I
earned and sacrificed a decade of my life for.
>
> Yes,
business ownership has is benefits but the price I’ve paid is steep and
not without wounds.
>
> Unfortunately, the cost of running
this business, and employing you, is starting to eclipse the threshold
of marginal benefit and let me tell you why:
>
> I am being
taxed to death and the government thinks I don’t pay enough. I have
state taxes. Federal taxes. Property taxes. Sales and use taxes. Payroll
taxes. Workers compensation taxes. Unemployment taxes. Taxes on taxes. I
have to hire a tax man to manage all these taxes and then guess what? I
have to pay taxes for employing him. Government mandates and regulations
and all the accounting that goes with it, now occupy most of my time..

quarterly taxes. You know what my “stimulus” check was? Zero. Nada.
Zilch.
>
> The question I have is this: Who is stimulating
the economy? Me, the guy who has provided 14 people good paying jobs and
serves over 2,200,000 people per year with a flourishing business? Or,
the single mother sitting at home pregnant with her fourth child waiting
for her next welfare check? Obviously, government feels the latter is
the economic=2 0stimulus of this country.
>
> The fact is, if
I deducted (Read: Stole) 50% of your paycheck you’d quit and you
wouldn’t work here. I mean, why should you? That’s nuts Who wants to get
rewarded only 50% of their hard work? Well, I agree which is why your
job is in jeopardy.
>
> Here is what many of you don’t
understand … to stimulate the economy you need to stimulate w hat runs
the economy. Had suddenly government mandated to me that I didn’t need
to pay taxes, guess what? Instead of depositing that $288,000 into the
Washington black-hole, I would have spent it, hired more employees, and
generated substantial economic growth. My employees would have enjoyed
the wealth of that tax cut in the form of promotions and better
salaries. But you can forget it now.
>
> When you have a
comatose man on the verge of death, you don’t defibrillate and shock his
thumb thinking that will bring him back to life, do you? Or, do you
defibrillate his heart? Business is at the heart of America and always
has been. To restart it, you must stimulate it, not kill it. Suddenly,
the power brokers in Washington believe the poor of America are the
essential drivers of the American economic engine. Nothing could be
further from the truth and this is the type of change you can
keep.
>
> So where am I going with all this?
>

> It’s quit e simple.
>
> If any new taxes are levied
on me, or my company, my reaction will be swift and simple. I’ll fire
you and your coworkers. You can then plead with the government to pay
for your mortgage, your SUV, and your child’s future. Frankly, it isn’t
my problem any more.
>
> Then, I will close this company
down, move to another country, and retire. You see, I’m done. I’m done
with a country that penalizes the productive and gives to the
unproductive. My motivation to work and to provide jobs will be
destroyed, and with it, will be my citizenship.
>
> So, if
you lose your job, it won’t be at the hands of the economy; it will be
at the hands of a political hurricane that swept through this country,
steamrolled the constitution, and will have changed its landscape
forever. If that happens, you can find me sitting on a beach, retired,
and with no employees to worry about…..
>
> Signed, THE
BOSS
>
> “The problem with socialism is
that you eventually run out of other people’s money.” Margaret
Thatcher

This may not all be true, but I think it tells a story of people who run businesses. That do not have the security of the utilities or a state job. Most business fail. If you fail at the Phone company, you file a grievance.

I did not write this, i just filled in some luxuries that are similiar to make it germaine and funny. This is someone else’s opinion. But it was worth mentioning. It pisses me off when someone says that you have so much and you should pay for me. Well I earned it Goddammit. I could have folded but I did not. I went to work everyday i could. ( I did write this part)

Easter’s Country Kitchen

1385 Washington St, Weymouth, MA
Tel: (781) 337-4123

In my never ending search for the perfect diners, drive-in’s and dives, I stumbled on Easters in Weymouth on the Hingham line. I mean on the line. I think one corner is in Hingham and the door is in Weymouth.

I did not exactly stumble in, I am a Weymouth guy. I have been here before. Never too late for a review.

Easters serves Breakfast and lunch. The real reason to go is for breakfast. The menu contains all the staples and the food is good and the portions large. Some restaurants forget what makes for a successful restaurant. They skimp on the potions and add parsley and twisted fruit to charge more. A sure recipe to keep me away. That goes big in Hingham for all the snobs, but not for me.

“Did you hear about the guy from Hingham? He was so conceited, he went to a bar and picked up himself”

back to the review; I had lunch at Easters today. I had sat at the bar. Always first choice. I went with two associates. I had the onion soup and the Knockwurst deluxe. First of all I asked for the corn Chowder off the menu, and was told by Christine that they have not had that in six months. The onion soup was good. It might have been better if the swiss cheese had been  a little more melted.

Did you ever order something that sounded great, but was just OK, and everything that came out looked better, and the stuff that your friends got looked awesome. That was the case here. One small knockwurst on a flat

Christine

hamburger bun with a piece of bacon and a piece of cheese. It was tasty alright. but I felt a little ripped off. I got chips ( you know the small bag with seven chips in it)  and my buddies got these heaping sandwiches with fries falling off the plates. They looked good and from what they said, They were delicious.

Any body can get something that falls a little short of expectations. But do not let my tiny knockwurst keep you from Easter’s. It is top notch and worth a trip. Ask for Christine. She is the really cute girl at the counter.

3 1/2 Monty stars out of a 5

" Bill thought he was President too!"

Bill Thought he was President too!

I love TV. I watch it whenever I can. I turn it on when I get home, and I watch it before I go to bed. TV is my best friend.

I have a question though. Why are there hot chicks on every show, even when the show does not warrant it? Do you think it sells? Maybe it is only the shows i watch?

Some of my favorite shows………………………

Big bang theory

I give her a 7

This is the girl next door to the nerds. She is kind of a butter-face. Her name is PENNY.

Hot or Not?

Garry Unmarried………………………………….

Pretty hot I would say 8

The ex wife. You wonder why till you see his current girlfriend. Only on TV broke house painters do not get hot chicks.

24……………………………………………

I give her a 9

You might say a 9 is high here, but check out the whole package. Good butt, cute face. I love freckles even though she covers them up with makeup. Looks a little like linsey Lohan.

She carries a gun too. Jack Bower hit this I think…

The mentalist……………………………..

We have two hot chicks here. You decide.

I go with a 7 here

She is a little too built up. big shoulders and arms.

8.5 is my evaluation

Something about her. The body is a little weird. short legs long torso. She always wears hip huggers.

Th mentalist guy is hitting this for sure.

Private practice…………………………

Stupid show. I dont watch, but if the wife is watching you cannot avoid checking out the hot gynocologists on this show. Makes ya want to jump in those stirrups.

2 7's a 8 and one 9

The unit…………….

8 because the others are 4's

This is a great show. Tiffy fools around with the other soldiers, and she is a stripper part time.

She has very round features. different looking.

All the other shows have hot chicks too. The reality shows like celebrity apprentice have hot contestants ( playmate of the year ) They have Ivanka Trump. They used to have the ice queen i forget her name, but she was a ten.

9.9

Survivor has hot chicks that roll around in the mud in bikinis to get a cheeseburger or a clue.

Big Brother is loaded with hot chicks.

The NFL channel even has hot chicks now. It goes on and on.

But my favorite show and the hottest chick on TV right now has to be Mary Alice on ” ace of cakes”

Check it out:

I am the president of the mary Alice fan club... she ranks a monty minute ten

I work with this guy who had an opportunity to ride his bike along with the elite woman runners in the Boston Marathon. He was reporting their progress, until he took a fall on national TV.

Watch him fall at about the 50 second mark of this You Tube

Paul Joyce

I had a discussion with Greg last night and he says he will only eat wonder bread. I have had the same discussion with Adams. This is a little quirky to me.

Isn’t white bread supposed to be bad for you?

So I looked up the nutritional facts. It is bad for you, in that it is loaded with carbs and sugar.

I am not sure what the fascination is. I thought you had to be under age 12 to have an appetite for white bread.

It does make better french toast.

Have you ever compressed a piece of wonder bread? It gets really small and almost looks like an eraser.

Wonder bread is also used to pick up guys I guess. That must be why gregory and Adams like it so much.

 Loading ...