Entries from April 2010 ↓

Not only was April 4th easter, it was my birthday and opening day!!!

Big day!!!!!

Huge Day!!!

Five year old Joshua Sacco rips out a song and says “screw You” to the Yankees at the opening Day ceremony at the red sox and Yankees opener on 4/4/2010

No
matter what this husband did in bed, his wife never achieved an
orgasm… Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they
decide to consult their Rabbi.

The
Rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the
following suggestion: ‘Hire a strapping young man. While the two of you
are making love, have the young man wave a towel over you.’

That
will help your wife fantasize and should bring on an orgasm… They go
home and follow the Rabbi’s advice. They hire a handsome young man and
he waves a towel over them as they make love.. It does not help and the
wife is still unsatisfied.

Perplexed,
they go back to the Rabbi. ‘Okay,’ he says to the husband, ‘Try it
reversed. Have the young man make love to your wife and you wave the
towel over them.’

Once
again, they follow the Rabbi’s advice.They go home and hire the same
strapping young man. The young man gets into bed with the wife and the
husband waves the towel.

The
young man gets to work with great enthusiasm and soon she has an
enormous, room shaking, ear-splitting screaming orgasm. The husband
smiles, looks at the young man and says to him triumphantly,
‘See
that, you schmuck? THAT’S how you wave a towel!!

My friend keith looks a little like Kramer from Seinfeld, so I thought i would post his picture. What do you think?

I told  ” dude your hair looks bad. So he got Amy to fix it with a homemade job with the floby

looks better now…..

With a week to go before Tiger dusts off the clubs at Augusta. You know that that shitstorm is coming. The cat calls, the women running through the ropes. the accuasations.

Tiger is a dirty boy. Have you read the text messages that he sent to just one of his 14 girls:

Emptysuit.com reports- GRAPHIC

Tiger:Sent: 06:01 PM 07/30/2009:I will leave an envelope at the front desk under ms daniels. Your room will be 305. Get settled and let me know when you are ready to see me. I will be i

Tiger:Sent: 06:01 PM 07/30/2009:n room 201. You can come down the stair well next to your room. Make sure absolutely no one sees you

Tiger:Sent: 01:27 AM 07/31/2009:Did you get lost. Door is open

Tiger:Sent: 04:18 PM 07/31/2009:Oh i know. Not at all. Just glad and suprised i can do that to you Im all clean. Come on down:)

Tiger:Sent: 06:36 PM 07/31/2009:Awesome baby. Be Safe

Tiger:Sent: 03:13 AM 08/01/2009:Thank you sexy

Tiger:Sent: 11: 08 PM 08/23/2009:I like when you do that to me

Tiger:Sent: 11:11 PM 08/23/2009:Ditto sexy

Tiger:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/28/2009:I want to be deep inside you

Tiger:Sent: 03:19 PM 08/29/2009:I need that so bad

Tiger:Sent: 03;29 PM 08/29/2009:Now:)

Tiger:Sent: 03:30 PM 08/29/2009:Me to. I would wear you out

Tiger:Sent: 03:32 PM 08/29/2009:I have no idea. I would love to have the ability to make you sore

Tiger:Sent: 03:35 PM 08/29/2009:In a week. I will try to wear you out

Tiger:Sent: 03:36 PM 08/29/2009:After i cum you better start sucking my cock to get it hard

Tiger:Sent: 03:56 PM 08/29/2009:You do. Need more of it

Tiger:Sent: 04″02 PM 08/29/2009:I want to treat you rough. Throw you around, spank and slap you

Tiger:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/29/2009:Slap your face. Treat you like a dirty little whore. Put my cock in your ass and then shove it down your throat

Tiger:Sent: 04:07 PM 08/29/2009:You are my fucking whore

Tiger:Sent: 04:08 PM 08/29/2009:Hold you down while i choke you and Fuck that ass that i own

Tiger:Sent: 04:10 PM 08/29/2009:Then im going to tell you to shut the Fuck up while i slap your face and pull your hair for making noise

Tiger:Sent: 04:48 PM 08/29/2009:You are. Always will be. Don’t trust people

Tiger:Sent: 5:00 PM 08/29/2009:I really do want to be rough with you. Slap you around

Tiger:Sent: 05:12 PM 08/29/2009:For years. And punish you for not seeing me more

Tiger:Sent: 05:15 PM 08/29/2009:I want you to beg for my cock. Kiss you all over to convince me to let you have it in your mouth

Tiger:Sent: 05:26 PM 08/29/2009:Next time i see you, you better beg and if you don’t do it right i will slap, spank, bite and fuck you till mercy

Tiger:Sent: 03:15 AM 09/07/2009:You are going to be headed to the hyatt lodge. 2815 jorie blvd oak brook, il 60523. Phone 630 990 5800

Tiger:Sent: 06:30 PM 09/07/2009:Let me know when your about 20 out i will order dinner. And what would you like to eat

Tiger:Sent: 07:38 PM 09/07/2009:Head to the elevators and go to 334. Thats your room. The door will be open with the dead bolt. I have to get back here to wait for the food. Im in room 358.

Tiger:Sent: 07:42 PM 09/07/2009:Let me know when you are in the room. Food just got here

Tiger:Sent: 07:47 PM 09/07/2009:Sweet. Dont come down here yet. Lots of people in the hall. I will let you know when it clears

Tiger:Sent; 08:32 PM 09/07/2009:Come on down. Its quiet here in the hall now

Tiger:Sent: 08:35 PM 09/07/2009:There is a room service cart in my hall. Be careful

Tiger:Sent: 08:35 PM 09/07/2009:Room358

Tiger:Sent: 10:23 AM 09/08/2009:So when can i have that ass again

Tiger:Sent: 12:42 PM 09/08/2009:I have to leave for an appearance at 430 but i will be back at 730 for dinner and lots of dessert with you. How about a quickie before i go:)

Tiger:Sent: 01:28 PM 09/08/2009:Have you ever had a golden shower done to you

Tiger:Sent: 03:41 PM 09/08/2009:Enter thru room 360. Its next door

Tiger:Sent: 03:42 PM 09/08/2009:Hurry so i come in that ass

Tiger:Sent: 07:32 PM 09/08/2009:You felt amazing to baby. How much was your flight by the way

Tiger:Sent: 07:35 PM 09/08/2009:Having a few issues at home. Might be a little later before i see you tonight

Tiger:Sent: 07:39 PM 09/08/2009:Parent hood melt down:)

Tiger:Sent: 06:02 PM 10/01/2009:Baby im not going anywhere or doing anything. You please me like no other has or ever will. I’m not losing that. You have to understand people love to tal

Tiger:Sent: 06:02 PM 10/01/2009:k about me. sometimes its good and sometimes its bad. I have learned to just roll with it no matter how much it upsets me when its not true. My life is a

Tiger:Sent: 06:02 PM 10/01/2009:fish bowl

Tiger:Sent: 10:40 AM 10/04/2009:Guys from dubai. Investors. So my agent being suggested that we go back to my room at the mansion for lunch. He doesnt know about us, obviously

Tiger:Sent: 11:31 AM 10/04/2009:This has been a total shit trip. Im sorry i fucked up last night. And this shit. We will get it right next time so we can spend more time together.

Tiger:Sent: 12:07 PM 10/04/2009:I told you. Oh my god. I cant believe what just happened

Tiger:Sent: 12:08 PM 10/04/2009:Don’t Fucking talk to me. You almost just ruined my whole life. If my agent and these guys would have seen you there, Fuck

I dont know. let the guy be a bad boy, but who says this shit.

Monty